You Can’t Cut My Toenails


No, you can’t cut my toenails, Mum,
because my toes aren’t there.
You see, I went into the forest
and they were eaten by a bear.

He didn’t eat my big toes up,
they’re both still on my feet.
I guess it’s only little toes
that those bears like to eat.

So you can cut my big toenails
(that doesn’t hurt a bit)
but thanks to that ferocious bear,
my big toe nails are it.

© Kristin Martin 2016

79 thoughts on “You Can’t Cut My Toenails

  1. Hi Kristin,
    This was a very funny poem that I could also think for kids who don’t want their toenails to be cut because my sister does not want my mum to cut her nails because she thinks she can use it as a defence.But this is a great and funny poem!


    • Hi Omesh,

      I used to hate getting my fingernails cut, because it always hurt! I thought this was a great excuse not to have them cut! I’m glad you think it’s funny.

      Can you think of any other excuses?


  2. Hi Kristin
    I love this poem it is so funny i even needed to go the toilet. When i read the title of the poem i knew it would be funny so i read it.
    In your poem you have not used that much rhyming words. Your poem was pretty short but that is okay. I used to make up stories to tell to my mum. I once told her about when a lion bit my toe ,she didn’t really believe me.

    • Hi Senehas,

      I like short poems because then you don’t have time to get bored when you are reading them. Do you like long poems? Some of my poems are longer, like ‘Frances was a Lion’.


  3. To Kristin
    Hi There Kristin I loved the way you wrote the poem because you made it funny and EXTREMELY addictive
    From Sapphira

  4. Hi Kristin,
    I always wait till the last minute to cut my nails but on the other hand Caleb (my brother) likes to cut his nails till he can’t see anymore of the top of his nail !!!! Love this poem you are a really good poet!!!!

  5. Hi Kristen
    That poem was very funny. I don’t like get my toenails cut either. Where did you get the idea of a bear eating a child’s toe nail?
    Great job on the poem!
    From Thinara

  6. Hi Kristin
    I too hate getting my nails cut, but I have to for netball games. This poem was so creative and interesting, and this child hs a good imagination. Did one of your kids say this?

  7. I really liked this poem as it sounds like me and I like the way it rhymes as it makes me feel my feet I hate having my toenails cut so I think this poem is for me.

  8. I am 9 and I chose this poem because I do NOT like having my toenails cut! I really enjoyed this poem because of the angry bears eating toes!

    This poem reminds me of a nightmare version of a teddy bears picnic!

    • Hi Ffion,

      Thanks for your comment. My son came up with the idea for this poem, because he didn’t like having his toenails cut either. He is a teenager now, so he manages to cut his own toenails.


    • Hi Dinethri,

      It was actually my son’s excuse when he was little. I thought it was funny so I wrote this poem. He wouldn’t mind if you borrowed his excuse. 🙂


  9. Hi
    I really liked the poem it was funny that i read it again and laughed and i liked it when it said that the bear had eaten my little toenails
    From Kiara

  10. The middle verse stands out to me because maybe the reason is that the bear is small so it can’t eat the big toenails.
    It relates to my life because I’m glad when my parents don’t do my toenails, and my toenails are quite weak so maybe if I was the character the bear might not have to bite as hard.
    I thought it was a great poem because it was funny and it had so much information in only 3 verses.
    You probably had 4-8 verses but summarised it really well.

    • Hi Ashton,
      I’m glad you like my poem. I wrote it for my son when he was a little bit younger than you, because he also didn’t like having his toenails cut.
      Did you find my website through the Children’s University? Because if you did, you’re the very first person to do so! (My website became a destination only a few days ago)
      Thank you!

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